There are days when I feel nobody cares

There are days when I feel nobody cares. I feel alone in this world full of expectation, tantrums, jealousy, anger, competition, and condescension.

These are the days when I question my friendships. I feel the sand slipping out of my hand, like it will all fall apart. My best friend will find a reason to leave me alone, I’ll be forgotten or ignored in this world where there is plenty a distraction.

So, I sit down and wonder, should I just give up? Should I take the first step back? To protect myself from the pain, agony, and embarrassment? Are relationships worth the effort they take (more often than not)? Would I be better off reducing my dependency amidst all the uncertainty?

While there are times when my answer to all of the above is a strong ‘Yes!’, I wake up the next day believing otherwise, I wake up with hope. Yes, I will lose some people along the way, maybe no one will be to blame but time, and maybe some of us will just grow apart. But i will not contribute to that, I will fight it. I will do everything to hold on to those that matter, because I dont know what life is if not about creating memories with those you love.

I fear the days I will lose some of these battles, but for now, I am focused on the silver lining – the people i hold on to will make this mundane and challenging journey worth it all.